Friday, 1 November 2013

Your weekly Clever Dicks roundup

It's been another utterly exciting week for anyone with the sense to follow what's been released by "the Dicks", as I imagine we're fondly referred to in gentlemen's clubs and speakeasies throughout the land. In fact I presume those aforesaid speakeasies are full of gangster types who are all "Say, Knuckles, have you seen what dem Dicks has been and gone and done dis week? See, for starters, see, dey released a new episode of dat Forgive Me Father hinky. It's about dis cat, see, who's telled hisself dat he's helping dis broad by keepin' an eye on her and dat, but really dat bird is just stalkin' the dame."

Then he'd probably pull out a kinetoscope and show them this.

"And you know what else dem Dicks has done? Dey's been and gone and released extracts from dey's books dat you can read on youse kindle and dem don't cost a dime! Now dat sure is a sweet deal! Dere's one dat's about all time travel and moider and dat!

The Trawler Man

And den dere's annuder one dat's all about zombies and moider and dat!

Naked Face Eating Zombies From Romford

And den dere's annuder one dat's all about moider and moider and dat!

Killing Elizabeth"

"How boss, how'd you do dem hyperlinks in speech like dat?"

"Shut youse yapper, Knuckles, I'm tryin' to tell you about what else dem Dicks has done! Dey's gone and been and done and released annuder episode of dat Heaven's Gate dingus! It beats me how dey's so prolific! Dis one's a bit of terrific coz at first look it seems like some wacky toon dat'll make youse laugh till youse sick, but dere's all dese deep philosophical points dat it's makin' only youse don't realise dat when youse watchin' it coz youse too busy laughin' youse head off!"

Then he'd get out the kinetoscope again and show them this.

So that's what I assume has been going on in speakeasies this week.

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